Check in with your Energy

First, reflect on any symptoms of burnout that might feel present in your life right now. Check-in with your energy, your mindset, how you have felt physically lately. remember it’s OK to feel however you feel

 This morning I feel OK. But recently I’ve been confused because I have so much work to do, and I don’t know where to start. I’ve been working as much as I could and then all the sudden, I’m so tired and I just sleep and sleep and sleep forever. I’m also being ravenously hungry a few minutes before bed because I find myself with a room in a complete mess and I don’t have the energy to take my shower.

Now think about if there’s anything impacting how you’re feeling. if you’re feeling burned out maybe it’s something external like an intense deadline coming up soon or a comment that rubbed you the wrong way. Maybe it’s something internal like negative self-talk. or if you’re feeling energized maybe it’s having more downtime or a project that feels fulfilling.  get curious about your feelings and watch them.

I am very scared about my ongoing move to another location who is I don’t know where to start. Also, I’m not sure if I’m going to have to downsize so I’m trying to organize my stuff and there’s just so much to do. That’s what I think of on a deadline I’ve also taken the time to look inside myself and I frankly find myself unable to really believe anything positive about myself pinion but when it comes to beauty, I have none in my own mind. This must stop.

I do say however, when I have positive energy in the morning, I feel a lot better. This was what happened today. And I got a fair number of things done. I hate to have a foggy head. And I seem to have a foggy head too much. But today I got up clear-headed.

Now think about how you can offer yourself kindness here. What do you need from yourself right now?

I think I must have patience when I get so tired. I think I must really try to recognize my qualities. I want to take every day to a time to dedicate to self-care. I would like to schedule it on my agenda. I also must think quietly about why I cannot see anything positive about myself and believe it. This too I want to schedule into my day. The problem with this is that when I try to think about my qualities, I just feel I’m ugly and start to really get distressed and cry.

to finish off try writing a kind phrase or a bit of encouragement for yourself for the week ahead. Something you can turn to when you need it.

I think I could refer to the phrase that has helped me in the past. It’s from an ancient text.

You are a child of the universe. Just like the trees in the stars you have a right to exist.

There was a time in my life that I really believed in this. I think I must go back to that time at least to that ability.

The more we notice how we’re feeling the easier against to notice burnout before it fully arrives let’s take a final deep breath in and repeat this with me, I accept that I can’t do it all the time.

Remember to say to yourself:

I accept that I can’t do it all the time.

 

From Fear to Growth

 Take the next few moments to reflect on a challenge you are facing it could be in annoyance at work or a curveball in your life.  

So how could I take advantage of a staycation and benefit the most from it? 

Have a couple of issues. 

1. One big one is there is little money in the bank. 
2. Having said that right now, I feel like just resting without even going outside too much. Hope that when I have regained my momentum, I will have the energy to go on a couple of photo safaris to exercise. 
3. The problem is how do I exercise, stay safe and enjoy myself without money. 

Notice one way you might be reacting with fear or feeling defeated.  

• Always little reluctant to lie down and just rest. Know my body needs caring. 
• I also have trouble scheduling therapeutic bath time. I just sometimes have a great reluctance to really take the time to take my shower.  
• Also having a wicked time with my air conditioner. It just does not control very well. Either I am freezing, or it does not work. It is very annoying since I am constantly switching it on and off.  

 

Learning means letting go of things that are out of our control. what can I let go of in your scenario?  

• Can try to see if I can arrange the bath situation better so that it is more pleasant to do.  
• Also, I think that with the air conditioner I can try to lower its speed so that it is hot but not as hot as the outside. Have trouble with the heat but if I drink more perhaps, I can work with that. 

 

Finally, let us focus on growth.  

Growth means practicing empathy for others and ourselves. it is learning to sit with the present moment even when it is tough take the next few moments to write a growth mantra something to remind you that you are growing. that this challenge is teaching you something. 

Vacation mantra: 

“Take time to self-care (on and off work) by improving this on my staycation.” 

 

We can shift how we respond to stress. We can move from fear to learning to grow and be kind to ourselves each step of the way.  

Remember: 

“Grow through change.”  

Start with Gratitude August 30

 Dear Tamara at the Calm App,

(Think about how this person has impacted your life think about how you met. and reflect on meaningful words phrases or lessons they shared or fun memories that stick out in your mind. or how they changed your life for the better.)

Calm and beginning my journey

I must stop for a moment to tell you just how much I appreciate the Calm App.  For many years I have not been able to calm down.  Day after day the stress built up without any recourse to quiet.  Finally, I heard about your app.  I had been introduced to you about that time. 

I like the name of the app. It is simply Calm. And that is where I started. It also helped that your app was less expensive than the other more multifaceted apps.  Calm was simple and it was straightforward.  Now, I am too large and the first thing I said was to find something with exercise. But after I purchased your app, I found that clearly, you were what the doctor ordered.  Before anything, I needed to find a way to relax.  To enjoy my day.  I found your app focused on exactly the right thing.

You tell us about using breathing as a tool. It couldn’t be simpler. It couldn’t be more welcome.  It is like I have the rhythm of the sea in my heart.

Thank you so much for your thoughtfulness. It is simplicity  (albeit deceptive) like yours that is sometimes so needed.

Imagine the Receiver. Or yourself opening the gratitude letter think about their response facial expressions and body language maybe they are smiling and beaming at your letter they could also feel overwhelmed and excited. on a separate page in new journal write down a couple of words you hope they feel.

I hope that you will find this letter gives you a little breathe of sunshine. I know you do not work on the app now, but others do. Still, I hope you will hear this and it will brighten up your day. If I am lucky, it will help you in your work. By someone mentioning once again that it is gestures of professionals like you that help the world become a refuge. 

Sincerely 

K.V.

 

 

 

A Fresh New Start. Whenever

Visualize a sheet of paper in front of you imagine it is covered in writing drawings photos and big swaths of colour. This was last week.  Maybe there are photos or pictures of moments that have stuck in your head splashed with colours or textures. feelings you experienced that were unique to your week.

Now take a fresh piece of paper. Take a moment to take it all in the highs and lows all that you did spots of joy and moments of connection and maybe some hard times to your life this week write it on this fresh sheet of paper.

What I want to remember for this week

• 1.     I must remember to improve my park for photography so that is about the time Friday comes along it will not be so heavy
• 2.       I want to get at least three hours done on working on my housing research so that I could visit another locale next week. I think it will be a residence. I would also like to start researching individual residences at the library.
• 3.       I must find a good place to eat when I go to the library. Or I might pack a sandwich and eat in the park which is nice there.
• 4.       I am still working on finishing those old receipts so that my meals and entertainment binder are finished.
• 5.       First and foremost, however, I still have tasks to do. Concentrating on housing research and receipts.
• 6.       I have a brand-new task that I am reinventing which is cleaning up my photographic binders. I have been thinking a lot about them, and I have some ideas to start work on. It is a question of preserving the safety of the works as well as making the visual experience of the viewer pleasurable
• 7.       I want more precious time working with healing myself and feeling better: finding my own kind of beautiful.
• 8.       I would like to work on formalizing my leisure time so that I feel high and not too tired or stressed out from work or especially, exercise
• 9.       I would also like to leave a little room in each day to smile and laugh by enjoying some gentling uplifting entertainment.

Plants and Animals 916. Art by K.V. Fabian

The Beatles - Eleanor Rigby (From "Yellow Submarine")

My Black Display Cabinet by Kathy Vivian Fabian

My Voice: Journal February 2

 

Question;

What does my voice sound like to me?

Answer; My voice is mostly music and I usually sing or listen to myself when I am alone. I am even afraid to sing. I can’t help it sometimes and I do so anyways. Alone my voice is always present. I speak to myself a lot if not constantly. It is a voice of a critic that is often negative. I’m learning to be a little bit benevolent sometimes my when voice is like that. When it’s benevolent it is great

My voice with other is defiant and scared. I have difficulty speaking in front of people So my voice there is quiet and used after a great deal of hesitation. Right now, my voice is mostly listening.

I comfort myself by thinking that my voice is actually the voice of the music and the thoughts that I listen to as well as the programs on television that I listen to. I guess it’s not a wonderful substitute but it’s what I have right now.

Question;

When have I used my voice to advocate for myself or for others? This would include times when you’ve encountered injustice or have given up. Or tell the hard truth someone who needed to hear it.

(Personal Note:

Before I go and dive into this, I have to say one hard truth. As someone who is advocated professionally in the past it occurs to me now clearly concisely since I am under the poverty line. It is best to include with a question of what you advocate for the word responsibility to yourself. If you advocate for yourself or someone else you have to look to see what the results will be. I understand that people do not help other people enough that is very clear. It is all over.

What is not clear is what happens and what remains after you advocate for somebody without checking out the reaction. This is never stated and this lack of responsibility to myself, personally, both by people who were advising me and myself, has caused me a great deal of harm. It is best to include when faced with a question of what you advocate with an eye to the responsibility you must maintain to yourself. If you advocate for yourself or someone else you have to look to see what the results will be. I understand that people do not help other people enough. That is very clear. It is all over. What is not clear is what happens and what remains after you advocate for somebody without checking out the reaction. This is never stated and has caused me a great deal of harm.)

So, with the above qualification in mind, I have a great deal of difficulty defending myself or advocating for my position. For example, recently I felt I was not served an adequate meal. I did not know why whether there was something wrong with me or something had gone wrong in the kitchen. I was afraid to ask and this bothers me a lot. However, at this point I find myself paralyzed with fear of punishment.

One great punishment is having a cocktail of having to live below the poverty line and not being able to speak to have your wish is listened or respected. (See above qualification in mind). One great punishment is not being able to escape the poverty line and not having any kind of ability to talk and therefore have your wishes respected.

 

Question;

When you are down how do you use your voice to encourage yourself and keep on going?

 

Answer;

I have a great deal of difficulty using my own voice to encourage myself. I have a tendency to be self-critical which I’m fighting now. However, I find these apps of meditation online very useful. For example, in One app gives a fair dose of self comforting. That is techniques to self comfort yourself. I find this extremely useful. Another app for meditation gives many ways that you could calm down. Using my voice to both self comfort, self encourage, and calm down or extremely important to me for my voice right now.

Question;

What does my voice stand for? what do I believe in right now? What values do I believe in?

Answer;

Right now, I am in a very private place.  I see no one but am going inside myself to a very hurt indistinct place (much like a fetus in a fetal position in a womb).  What my voice stands for right now is self-healing. Finding the right ways to calm myself down so that I am not confused. I am working to self comfort myself enough to begin to see the beauty in others, to remember even remotely the good relationships that I have had in the past.  The values that I believe in is courtesy and respect to others and mostly to start with myself. My voice is focused on regaining my own sense of self worth which is chronically missing at this time.

Let me take a moment to thank my voice for, after a long search, finally finding some avenues to calm myself down and recently even make myself feel comforted.

 

Personal Note: I love the recent finds I have had with the apps I find online. However, I would like some other apps. If you know of a meditation on financial wellness, more specifically dealing with protecting my artwork in my possession (yes, it is in danger), as well as getting off a situation of financial dependence and poverty, or one on finding your own kind of beautiful (with tips on music to play, actions to do, fashion advice) that would be very much appreciated.  These meditations can not be too long since I would like to do them each day and I have other meditations in my rep now. If you have info on the subject, please write me at www.facebook.com/theartfabiancompany or contact me at www.instagram.com/kvfabian or at @KKFabian

January 7, 2021: Walking a Tightrope

I live ina woman's residence. we are in the middle of a pandemic crisis. If I would sum up the mood of the place at this time. Let’s say, someone, is administering policy for avoiding life-threatening situations.  And the words that are used are very scary and menacing. And yet at the same time, what exactly the threat is and what to do about it is made open to interpretation. Because at this time the repercussions of getting the disease are so enormous that every little word takes enormous importance.  

In self-defence, policymakers have to give themselves a little wiggle room because people are jumping on things they say casually like these casual words are of extreme truth and importance. but the words themselves give only have a general idea of the direction of what to take. 

They know, for example, that this or this person might have been exposed to COVID-19. So, they could only sit on certain chairs in the house. But which chairs are not clear so all chairs except very few are off-limits?

On the other hand, let’s say someone sits on a chair because he/she has always done, without thinking. And a worker in the residence reacts as if the act is life-threatening. He doesn’t really know if it will or it won’t but the uncertainty itself is both extremely stressful and frightening.

The resulting confrontation creates uncertainty and confusion that makes a difficult situation all the scarier.