Why is half of my reward money being given to someone else?

I had, after performing an act of heroism to a high placed dignitary, been asked as to what I would like as a token of gratitude for the act of heroism rendered.  I asked that I would be given enough money so as to avoid the dismal fate of a senior without any funds.  I stated because of my dismal situation to date, that the sum should not a small one as it would be used for the rest of my life.  As this discussion took place someone came up and said my brother should receive some money as well. Since he was much more affluent than men and I was already embarrassed I felt this was inappropriate but I do believe, as far as memory serves me, my brother receive some funds as well and this despite the fact he had refused to take place in any of the action concerning this act since it was to be dangerous. He stated, not for the first and last time, he had responsibility to his family and did not want to get involved.  IF he is still receiving half of the money I was to receive for life, well, then that this twice the sum of a meagre fund.

The only trace of this money existing and being given to others in my family is in my memory. There is no trace of the practice in any form through the auspices of the government either through paper, conversation or in the yearly tax statements. So, has my reward money been divided in half, one part going to my brother who is much more affluent than me? 

Now neatly, without a sound, without a problem, do I receive every month half of the money that I was originally supposed to have? Is the money given without a problem and without any visible trace by the system? Is this standard? How come I didn't even think about this possibility until now? Nor question it.

And second, when I was told that I should give half my reward money to the other members of my family, (who are much more affluent and financially stable than me, not to mention, hostile) how come I agreed? And how did I look? did I look incapable of handling money? or contemptuous of money? or a Wastrel?   Am I being promoted as this? And most of all, how come I agreed and have not said a word about this practice until now. Is the grateful dignitary being thus twice imposed on? Am I being looked upon as greedy? Or unconcerned about changing my impoverished situation which is considerable.

One more thing.  If I did not know that I am being represented as willingly giving half my reward money to another more affluent entity, then how can I state that this is far from true. As a matter of fact, how can I defend myself?  If I am under the assumption that the sum is a normal sum of money that one can expect to live from the state pension, how can I protest the sum given to my brother when faced with a condemning and sensitive state system?

Horror of Being Like Someone's Grandmother

I have always had a horror of being like someone's beloved grandmother who I had known in childhood.  The prodigal son took his grandmother's welfare cheque each money because she did not need it.

To me this seemed like an awful thing to do. The woman had her bed in a small room that was also the room where the television set was.  It was a bed that folded into a couch. When it was hockey night, the whole family would use the room to watch the game.  She was never out of the house and she never wore anything but an old robe. And if she was not in this little room, she was in the kitchen cooking for the family. I have always had a horror of being like this woman. The grim life of this woman was certainly due to the utmost indignity of her being deprived of any money.

I have several times in my life been told that I have no right to money. I for one, would really like to know why. Is it because I must have the same fate as this woman?

In my life I fought as much as I could to avoid this fate. So, it is with a fair degree of horror that I have discovered, and no one told me this, it is just from having a lot of time on my hands to think and rest, that the money I received from social aid, through the auspices of a benevolent V.I.P. from another country, might have been taken by my family

Pondering The Shackles of Poverty. Holiday Season

The Shackles of Poverty

It is now the holiday time and as the celebrations for most of the world go on. For me it is a time for a reality check. I find myself shackled with the bonds of poverty. I have, until now, carefully been watching my money seem to disappear. Financial necessity is forcing me to retreating more and more to my studio.  On the one hand this is good because I am getting a lot of me art work and collection organized.  I can see where I have gone and where I am going to.

The dismal feeling, I have when faced with mown poverty is heightened as my dentist tells me it is time to have my teeth capped. I don’t know how much that will cost and it worries me.  I, however, know that is frankly time to take care of my teeth in that manner.

I am on a diet and I cannot eat everything that the home serves. Sometimes I just forget that when I do, my carbs, calories and protein skyrocket. So rather than aggravating the situation and not having the means to buy more appropriate food, I diet the poor way. I lie down and calm down instead of eating food that I know is damaging to me. Let's call not eating the poor man's diet(lol).

All this to say I have been doing a lot of lying and thinking. I think about the past. I think about the future. I think about mistakes and how come I don't have any money in the first place.

I know the reason I don’t have any money is because of my being placed in a shelter. I stopped trying to make money or to save it because the only thing that I thought would happen is that it would be confiscated by an unfeeling system that deals with the abandoned and the homeless. As time went on this thought was proven right.

However, this has been going on a long time and as old age is near, I am going to attempt to rectify the situation.  The going is tough and slow.

What happens to a trust foundation money after I die.

I had a meeting with a social worker a couple of years ago.  The conversation centered pretty much around money because I am very concerned with my impoverished financial position.  If you are a social worker than, at the very least, it should be clear that a condition of poverty is an undesirable social condition ( I thought).  At least that's what I thought.  Upon some further ad-hoc reading I have understood that charitable organizations are forbidden by law to change in any way financial situations of their clients. At least that's what I understood.

Be that as it may, The subject came up that I am unable to touch most of the inherited estate. Since the money is in trust for me that meant, I thought that the money that was untouched would be very useful for my brother and his family. I thought that if I did not use the money what was left would be inherited by his heirs. This would mean that there is a direct conflict of interest and my brother would work very hard to have the estate monies remain intact for his heirs. And I would be prohibited from touching any of it.

The social worker assured me that this was not the case.  If the money that was put in trust it could in no way be used by anyone else. If I did inherit a large estate and I could not touch any of it and lots remained after my death it would simply go back to the government coffers.  (So what).

In my dealings with such matters I had found that in theory, the money does indeed go back to the government treasury untouched. But in practice, this is often not the case.  It is not very good for a government to receive untouched money because they are the ones who minted it in the first place. An intact sum of money given back to the treasury means that the original owner could not use the bread. The more bread he made, the smarter he/she was.  the more they leave it. the less they were able to use It. this the value of the money can be depreciated if the treasury receives a too large sum of money from an estate.i have encountered canny organizations that keep abreast of the latest illnesses and death in the hope that the government will slip the money to them instead of having it go, in front of unhappy eyes, unused, back to the treasury.

It is a relieved government official that can get rid of that embarrassing problem by simply giving he bread to this or that charity.  Thus often charities, schools or other organizations watch obituaries and hospitals to see if they could suggest the use of unwanted monies.

So. Where does that leave me?

The Aftermath of the Inheritance

Its been a few years since my mother passed away and much has happened.  Despite my efforts, I received very little if anything at all from the family estate.  I thought that the house was given to a supposedly benevolent gentleman to cover any costs that would be incurred if he took care of my life.
Just before he died my father wept that he was grieving he did not leave me anything after he passed away (in the form of cash or even enough money to get by).  So I thought that first of all there will be two houses.  And second of all, as you can see in thins blog there was a lot of expensive things that my parent collected in their older years.
Since I had no success keeping large sums of money in my possession, since they were stolen or confiscated both in and out the court system, I thought that at least I could benefit from an inheritance.
Well, it's all very fine and dandy to have two houses and a complex estate as well as a company and a building.  But if you do not leave a good solid will it does your heirs no good.
When my father passed away my mother's health and sanity was gravely troubled so I thought we made a deal that she should, only in name, inherit the money and the estate.  She would not have the power to do what she wanted with it but would be able to benefit from it.  And in turn, through goodwill, I would be protected when she passed away.
Unfortunately, that was not the case.  Suffice to say that the money I was left when my mother passed away was just above the amount I received from social security. Not only that it is not indexed so each year the sum decreases. I had the great misfortune to see everything in that house disappear: jewelry, furniture and very disturbingly all the papers that she collected official and otherwise.
I have asked repeatedly for copies of the deeds of the houses and have met with no luck either from my brother who manages the estate nor the government officials. I have not seen my brother for more than a year and only talk to him on the phone.
On paper, I have found two things.  I am registered with the provincial government as part of the shareholders and board in the company that my father left me. However, I receive no salary whatsoever and I have no documentation as to how much the company makes, now much, if at all my brother gets as a salary.  More disturbingly I each year declare my taxes as someone who lives below the poverty level and is completely intellectually incapacitated.  I wonder if the government will accept the fact that I share my father's company with my brother taking these factors into account.
As for the will my mother left, I have absolutely no power whatsoever to use any of the money that was left to us.  It is to pass directly to my brothers' children.  My brother is supposed to be the one responsible to handle my needs and his reaction to this is to wash his hands off everything. I am to live on my own with the money that I inherited and the government social assistance that I merit because the sum is so meager.
The question I ask is if I declare each year by the auspic3s of a chartered accountant that all the money I have is so below the poverty line that I must resort to social assistance, then Do I have the right, according to the government, and on paper,  that I  own that company that my father and mother left me if I have no record of anything at all that I receive from it and have never done so.  Especially since I have absolutely no power, according to my mothers will to do or learn about anything in it. Nor will I receive anything from it except this very symbolic and meager sum I now receive.
I have read that in your late middle age people have a false illusion that everything is okay if they live below the poverty line because that is relatively able-bodied and independent. But this a false paradise.  You are walking a tight rope and if anything goes wrong there will be severe problems.